I'm so depressed

Everything is just so hard. People never understand. Things have gotten worse and that’s What made me go to the doctor last week. I had see another doctor because I was in denial. All the symptoms where there…and the horrible migraines,abd panic attacks I was seeing a psych for.
So to say the least, the doctor too, diagnosed me with fibromyalgia. I’m not really in denial anymore but my family just don’t understand. My dad makes things so hard for me. He thinks I just need exercise and vitamins and that I’m lazy. Others think I’m exaggerating,or look like their tired of me dragging around.
I hate going out. Especially to other family homes. I don’t like having to explain why no one can touch me or why I can’t sit for too long or don’t want to do a thing. I’m in pain.
It’s getting really bad and I’m in a constant flare. My skin is so tender. I’m always in the minimum. I hate to go anywhere because I don’t want to wear clothes.
I’m just tired. So tired. This is such a hard life to live. And it will never stop. I didn’t think at 24 I would live in my room in the bed. I hate it. It’s hard. I can’t get with this. I’m trying my absolute best.
No dating, no friends, or social life. Not even possible besides internet.
Man o man

Teesa

I know it's hard girl, but try to hang in there. try to get your family and friends to read up on fibromyalgia. sometimes the info educates them enough to lighten a little on us. But they will never totally understand. even we ourselves learn

different things about it all the time. I just found this place a few days ago and I am very excited to know there are people who understand. sending prayers your way.

Tessa,

I was just diagnosed yesterday so I completely understand the denial and wanting to question the diagnosis. I don’t think I’ve really processed it yet, I suspected that I might have fibro after being diagnosed with myofascial pain syndrome and doing a bit of research and realizing I had symptoms from both but even as I wait in the waiting room yesterday I hoped the rheumatologist would say I didn’t have it. But it was a resounding “well you do have fibro.”

But I’m not writing to tell you my medical history, I wanted to say I share your feelings of not wanting to leave the house because I never want to stay long so why bother and I get tired quickly so I need to rest or not wanting to socialize because I don’t feel like smiling because all I can think about it how much pain I’m in. Or wondering if people think I’m faking my pain or that I’m a wimp especially if they see me on a good day.

I too have been living in my room for 95% of the past 10 months (the other 5% has been primarily at doctors appts and tests and acupuncture, etc) since things got so bad that I had to withdrawal from graduate school.

I can’t stop worrying about being able to date and wondering if I’ll get married or if I’ll be strong enough to get pregnant and all these things that should not matter 1 day after diagnosis but I can’t help it… If you want to chat more, I’m here.

Teesa,

Unfortunately, all of these things come with having a chronic illness. The stages of grief, family and friends who will never understand, and the feeling that we've lost all semblance of a normal life.

As hard as these things are, just remember that we all go through this, it's normal, and that we are always here to support each other --because this is where you'll find the understanding we all need.

Hugs,
Renie♥

Hi Teesa, it does take a long time for patients, family and friends to understand fibromyalgia. The positive thing is now you have been diagnosed and you know what you need to fight. Fibromyalgia is not a death sentence; but it is very hard to live with.

You’re much too young (in fact even us seniors are) to just give up. If you want to get out of your room and have a social life, there are some things you can do.

  1. Learn as much about fibromyalgia as you can.
  2. Find information you can use to educate your family and friends on fibromyalgia and ask for their support.
  3. Keep track of your symptoms, what seems to make it worse/better etc. and learn to describe them to your doctors.
  4. Meet with your doctor and discuss medications and other treatment options, maybe your dad will go with you and learn more.
  5. Learn to manage your pain and fatigue as much as possible; eat healthy and yes be more active when possible
    6c Research alternative medicine and supplements and discuss with your doctor. The forum discussions and internet will give you a number of ideas.
  6. Put together a plan for yourself, small steps and set small goals.
  7. Identify the things you absolutely need help with and learn to ask for help.
  8. Probably more, but above all don’t give up.

No one else can do this for you, your doctors can give you guidance, your family and friends and the forum can give you ideas, encouragement and support, but the only one who can get you out of your room and back in a social life is you.

Now you’re probably thinking I can’t do this I’m too tired, I hurt too much, she doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Maybe you’re right, but I have faith that you are a bright and brave young woman that’s got her whole life in front of her and that you can do this. One step at a time, one goal to improve the quality of your life.

There will probably still be some days you want to stay in your room; there’s days I do and I’m pretty old, but hopefully you’ll have more good days than bad with lots of fun and laughter, Don’t give up on yourself Teesa you’re much too valuable to do that.

Gentle hugs

Dena
I’m very glad to have found this place and you guys. Things would’ve been much harder. No one understands and its not easy to explain, but you guys get me. My mom looked it up but i don’t think she understands just how bad it can be. My sister works at a disability office. She’s heard of it and says she knows how severe it can be, everyone else just thinks I’m acting funny and antisocial.
I’m just having bad days and sad because I’m finally out of denial and i know things will never be the same

Allison i would love to chat more. You remind me of myself. I’ve been wired crazy about the same exact things. It gets me so depressed,plus this non stop pain as a reminder that i have fibro every second of my life. Im just depressed that things won’t ever be the same. I’m taking meds for fun or seems like. Nothing works.
I’m going to add u as a friend. We should talk.
Thank you for the feedback. … many hugs

Thanks Renie
I know it’s all part of my illness bit that doesn’t make me happy to know. It still hard. Its beyond normal and people look at me like I’m so weird. It makes me just want to curl up in a corner.
I love you guys though and happy I’m here because when I’m here i don’t feel out of place. Here is a place where it’s normal. … thanks you Renie. … many many hugs love

B2chi
Thanks for that amazing list.
Those are great things to do and try. Im trying my best to stay positive. I’m heading out grocery shopping now besides the fact my body doesn’t want to. I know my dad will never get it nor go to an appointment.
I’ll try to pay attention to my body and list things.

Thanks a bunch

FANTASTIC advice!!!

Thank you i need those prayers. I’m falling apart inside. I just want to cry. The pain doesn’t stop and I just woke up from being in denial. I’ve been working so hard and now i have nothing but fibro…can’t work. Im only 24. I wonder what my life will become. I’m actually a very positive person and like to help others. I was a nurse asst. But anyways i guess this is part one. Which is realizing you have fibro and you need help,support,and always going to be in pain.

I just want to cry… ill be ok. Its part of the steps i guess.
Thank you all so much. I love all of you.

Hi Teesa,

I understand completely how you feel, BUT you can get through it. I've been diagnosed with fibro for only about 7 months, but I know I have likely had it all my life with all its crazy symptoms. It is just that it has gotten worse in recent months. BUT even with all of that if you will to go forward and to find someone to love and to have children - know that you CAN do it. I pressed forward wanting those same things and thinking that it would never happen until one day it did. I have been married for 13 years now and I have had two children. It was hard, but I did it and so can you. Luckily, I have a husband who understands (not that that has been easy either). But, there is always hope. You must keep believing and keep trying. Life still goes on - even if it is harder for us than for a lot of others. You are so young yet and have your whole life to look forward to. Make up your mind to enjoy your life and you will.

Hopeful thanks so much for sharing that with me. It gives me hope. I appreciate that. I look forward to finding someone to spend my life with and have a family. I know it will be hard But I’m going to try my best to stay positive.

Hi Teesa, and welcome.

I hope your doctor has started trying some meds for you, as some do help with the fibro pain, especially Lyrica and Cymbalta.

I'm sorry that your father is having such a hard time understanding fibro. I know it's hard to comprehend. You can tell him that new research indicates that our blood flow is not being properly managed, so we end up with low blood flow, which causes lactic acid to build up in our muscles. Lactic acid is what causes pain when we exercise! So your low blood flow is making you feel like you just did a really hard gym work out! Maybe if you lay it out like that for him, he could better understand it.

You're right, it's a lousy illness to deal with. But it does get better, with good treatment and with support. We're here for the support. We do understand your pain and fatigue and frustration. We will listen to you and try to offer support and advice. You're not alone in this.

Please do come back. There are so many nice people here who want to share their own ideas and suggestions.

Hugs,

Petunia

Thank you Petunia. You are sweet. I didn’t know that it was because of the blood flow management. That’s good to know. I hope they continue to figure this out and hopefully find a cure. I’m hanging in there and hoping for better days. My dad doesn’t understand and i know he never will. All he says is to exercise or something crazy. He isn’t trying to understand. He just says im too young and need to diet, go out,exercise, etc. So i gave up on that.

I’m taking cymbalta and lyrica. Cymbalta makes it bearable to the point i can get out of bed. But lyrica does nothing. I felt like it made things worse. I’m suppose to be picking up savella today. So I’ll be on cymbalta and savella. …

Gentle hugs. Thanks