Hello I am an 80year old woman joined Bens Friends when I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia I am widowed in my earlier years my husband and I were Foster Carers and ended up adopting a toddler with Downs Syndrome who has turned into a lovely young man had one son of our own before taking up fostering I worked as a PA and then took up nursing these days I am confined to a wheelchair when I go out due to chronic back problems.I live quietly in a lovely village in Scotland.
Wow, you have done some incredible things in your life so far. I’m sorry to hear you are confined to a wheelchair and I hope you can manage with that.
I understand a lonely life too. I live in Thailand away from my small number of friends and family who are in the UK. I moved here with my partner at the time as our jobs relocated. We had a dreadful breakup after a couple of years and my life dramatically changed. It is difficult to feel motivated sometimes especially when my back, arms and legs are very painful. Loneliness can be especially difficult but groups like these help me greatly. I hope you make great connections through this group.
Sending you strength and support x
Thank you Becca for your reply I am sorry to hear of your break up with your partner and how lonely you feel at times but I is remarkable how we plod on and get through it do not feel lonely come on here and talk to me at any time.Hope you are well.
Hi Annette! I’m glad you joined Ben’s friends. I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia July 2018. I was a nurse and had to quit my job and go on disability. Loneliness was like a slow death for me. One year ago, I decided to be more open with friends about my life. This has really decreased my loneliness. About six months ago I was grocery shopping. It was a great day. My pain level was low and the sun was shining. I find that I talk and talk and talk when I feel good. I guess I’m making up for the many more days that I’m in bed with horrible pain and fatigue. So that day in the grocery store, I ended up talking to this women about peanut butter! Forty five minutes later, we found out each other has fibromyalgia! Crazy! We are good friends now. So Annette, you have friends here who care about you. I care about you. I hope you are getting the support and care you deserve. Many blessings, Jean
Hello… glad I just happened to pop in and read this thread! I too am a nurse forced to retire due to Fibromyalgia as well as back and neck injuries. I am now “disabled.” So sayeth the Social Security Administration.
It’s bittersweet… the process was grueling and waaaay too long. I carried on with a tiny business providing canine care… but when COVID-19 put the world on lockdown, my meager earnings ran out fast. Followed every government guideline to the letter to seek financial assistance. NOT ONE OF THEM provided aid, or even a follow up. My stimulus check hasn’t even arrived yet, and my taxes were filed April 4.
And just when I thought I couldn’t get by another day, the Disability thing finalized. Relief barely describes it. And yet… I am re-experiencing the grief I thought I’d worked through about losing my career, one which brought me so much joy, along with the pride, contentment and security of always being able to take care of myself.The guilt for not being on the front lines with my friends and former colleagues. And the instability, stigma and repeated blows to self esteem one must learn to live with when living in chronic pain.
All these feelings and more, while isolated in a Pandemic can get the best of the most resilient among us. And I count us nurses as the most resilient among us!
But then I remember I can drop by here and be surrounded by people just like me, and I know I’m not alone, and I know I’ll be okay.
My hope and wish is that you will, too!
Please stay safe, stay SANE, and stay healthy!
Hello I can appreciate how you must feel being forced to give up the career you so love at least I was a long time retired when I became disabled but like yourself have had feelings that I should be here doing my bit too in these terrible times I am sorry your little business was hit so hard and you had to fight so hard to get what you were entitled to yes I know we nurses are supposed to go with the flow and show the stiff upper lip but I have learned to go with the flow if I feel like a cry I have a cry ect come on here anytime always some of our lovely people who will talk to you including myself I am always about on line as I have just became a moderator for the forum.Stay well .
Thank you, Annette78! I look forward to “chatting” with you again soon.
You have a tough situation;you are indeed resilient, and you give me courage to face my challenges Thank you for sharing. If each of us can mange day to day to face life and keep reaching out, we have a victory.
Thank you for the nice reply how are you I hope you are well and coping I am still in lockdown with my son coping although suffering terribly with my back like everybody else getting fed up with staying in but better days coming hopefully take care of yourself.
Hello Annette! I’m Shari. I’m also disabled from healthcare, but I’m not a nurse like so many on here; I’m an RRT. I find it interesting that there are so many in healthcare that end up with fibro. There are quite a few from my hospital. Welcome to this group! I actually joined a while back, but just got back on here. Hugs to you!
Hello Shari I too have noticed there are quite a few people on the forum who are from healthcare I have actually been with the group for some time now as I have just become a moderator for the forum and was updating my profile which I think made members think I was new to the group thanks for replying and I hope you are
Isn’t it funny sometimes; the way the Universe sends just what we need… exactly when we need it.
Your words are deeply appreciated… I’ve been having a few very difficult days, and of course when pain and fatigue ramp up, it’s easy to begin to worry and become discouraged.
Thank you for reminding me of my strengths.
I’m so grateful that we have each other here!
Be well, and stay safe dear!!
It simply awes me when I think of all the people who are living with this pandemic and already had fibromyalgia/ME. We have strengths we never knew apparently. Every chronic illness has its own particular misery, but fibro seems to get into every inch of life, and it is so hard to describe to outsiders. I send my best wishes to you and hope you find joy and comfort in spite of everything.
Hello Abby if it has taught me anything that there are still a lot of good folk out there I am still in lockdown and coping hope you are well Annette
Hello Jean as I have not seen you on the forum I thought I would check and see how you are doing I hope you are well our weather here in Scotland is lovely sunny and hot at the moment we are just being eased a bit out of lockdown but I still cannot go out but have been managing out to sit in the garden just wish it was all over stay well and I hope you are having some good days.
Hi Annette78! Thank you for inquiring about my absence. I’m having a difficult time dealing with the daily chronic pain of fibromyalgia. I use to have some days where I would just have normal lower level pain. But every day for two months I wake up in horrendous pain. It hurts so bad I feel like cutting my legs off. I’m also dealing with a lot of grief and loss along with dealing with PTSD issues. It’s almost like everything
sad and painful is occurring at the same time. Thus my pretty optimistic outlook on life is being challenged by hopelessness. I’m so sad I often wish I wasn’t alive. I spend most of my days in bed and am able to maybe have three hours where my pain is low enough I can walk and do minor activities around the house. I don’t mean to feel sorry for myself. I am amazed at all the Fibro warriors out there that still work, raise a family and persevere despite the pain. I am happy that summer is here, the sky is blue and some of out coronavirus restrictions are being lifted. I hope you are getting the support you need and deserve. Thank you again Annette for your kindness and compassion. . Jean
Hello Jean, Sorry you are suffering so much and I appreciate how difficult it is to be in pain every day as I am the same especially with my chronic back problems I think the lockdown makes things worse but Jean never wish you were not alive we all have a reason for being here what keeps me going is my special needs son I need to be here for him.You are strong and can get through it hopefully better days coming for us all.I am always around on the line so come on talk to me at any time .
Hi Annette! How are you doing? I’m doing much better. My Fibro is the same but I’m leaning how to live a new and different life. I haven’t been around the forum for a long time. So many changes have happened in the last 12 months. Instead of fighting my Fibro symptoms and consequences, I’ve decided to look at what I CAN do having and living with Fibro. Not always an easy task. How are you doing with the coronavirus in Scotland? Are you able to stay connected with friends and family?
Hello nice to hear from you I am glad to hear that things are a bit better for you my fibro I can cope with but in terrible pain, with my back problems things were beginning to open up a bit here in Scotland but they are closing down again in places because of the virus breaking out again I have not been out of the house since it all started as I am in a wheelchair when I do go out just wish we could all see an end to it. Keep well and safe. Annette.
Hi Annette, do you have anyone to help you with daily activities? Are you able to walk at all or are you totally wheelchair bound? I can tell you are in A LOT of pain. I’m so sorry. I’m sending you big hugs to you!